I am a Rock and Roll Astronaut. I am an Electric Pornstar. I am a Demon of Cosmic Apathy. I am the Prince of Hopeless Poets, and the Devil in Disguise. I am the uncontested Emperor of Antarctica. ("Eskimo.")
My tounge is a thousand razors, my eyes are like blue lasers, I have a 125 megaton superweapon mind. I'm cold, I'm hard, I'm stainless steel. I know just how it is I make you feel. I send electric little shivers racing up and down your spine.
And still I'm all alone. And still I have no home.
I am a Rock and Roll Astronaut married to a Princess Balerina Doctor. I am dating a Supermodel Phycisist on the side. I am an Evil Genius. I have ten miles of guts. I lay on the couch and stretch out each day. There's a red popsicle in my freezer waiting, but I don't deserve it. No, I don't deserve it.
Like a spider wearing rubber gloves, a two-headed baby that no one loves. Like a porcupine kiss, you'll never miss me when I'm gone.
The sun hurts my eyes. The sun hurts my eyes.
I saw a fat lady in the supermarket with a tattoo on her inner ankle, and it looked like a bruise. And there's a young mother at the bus stop waiting, but she's not waiting for me.
I am an unstoppable dynamo of useless knowledge. I am a juggernaut of surrealistic nonsense. I am the Godzilla of twisted logic and dry wit.
I am a Rock and Roll Astronaut, and this is what I like about the universe.