Thursday, March 07, 2013

History of My Fake Bands: Part 1 - The Bourgeoisie

Having a fake band seemed like such a natural idea to me, I can't really tell you how it came about. I can tell you that my lack of vocal talent seemed like a minor detail in my quest for coolness ...and of course chicks.
My best friend in high school, [Name], was of a like mind. The difference being his possession of legitimate musical talent. This was a bonus for lending credence to the existence of the band, but ended up being our ultimate demise when he sold out in college and joined an actual band.

The most effort we put into it was landing on a name. We wanted something that conveyed the suburban, blue collar, middle-classness of our existence. The Bourgeoisie seemed to fit the bill almost too well. We double-checked that we were using this correctly, and then went with it despite it being a bitch to spell. We wanted a logo that would be easily identifiable to offset that. A cog seemed obvious, but try rendering that on the back of a notebook in Sharpie. We opted for a hex nut instead.

We were a college rock duo heavily influenced by The Smiths and They Might Be Giants - theoretically. I was lead vocals, he was lead guitar and keyboard. We had a younger friend who was a featured artist on piano and horns. I am not sure he was ever made aware of that.

More importantly was my cousin, Coco, who we had to include somehow. As unfitting as it was, she agreed that backup singer was the best fit. My bat-shit crazy, quasi-girlfriend of that era got in on that action too. At a later date, the future Mrs. Pezda was given honorary status. She may have even been there first to ask what the backup singers were called. The answer came out of my mouth without any thought, "The Proletariettes."

How successful were we? We had at least one guy submit a demo tape looking to join. Admittedly, his interest was at least as much in my aforementioned cousin as it was in whatever cool points he could earn. He sang a rendition of our song "Naked Velvet Oil Paintings." This was pretty impressive considering this was only a title; there wasn't actually a song. We still didn't let him join.

There was a tape we made for our friend's birthday that was just us goofing around. There is very little music on that tape. Then there is a double EP I made by dubbing over and editing a bunch of snippets [Name] sent me in college. I did this using a boom box and a shelf system with a karaoke mic. So take that and shove it up your Postal Service, Ben Gibbard!

The Bourgeoisie ran from about 1989 through around 1991. It lingered on a little after that in thin forms of heightened abstraction. You never really get over your first fake band.


Fran said...

You may not believe this, but I was a *huge* fan of your first fake band!

Evil Genius said...

Of course I believe it! We had a huge cult following in my mind.

Red said...

@Fran - I'm so accustomed to FB now I was looking for the "like" button on your post. (This is where I'd use the emoticon for a Charlie Brown face but emoticons aren't quite that advanced.)