Ah, forbidden fruit! Though fruit is rarely on the forbidden list. Red meat on the other hand...
First we need to establish the authorities involved in placing my dietary restrictions: 1. Doctor Lady 2. Red. Which one do you think has more rules? Which one do you think is more fun to disobey?
The answers are 2 and 1 respectively. It is the level of authority held by Doctor Lady (not to be confused with the lady doctor) which makes it more enjoyable to ignore. I don't actually enjoy sneaking off to Kabob Bazaar behind Red's back, but sometimes it needs to be done. Not to assert my independence, but because I am a slave to deliciocity.
When the day comes, and it will, that Doctor Lady tells me my days are numbered, I would strongly advise a clear path be kept between me and the nearest purveyor of chili cheese fries. I hold all of my esteemed readers in the highest regard, but your ass is toast if you try to obstruct me from a self-induced culinary coronary. Delaying this innevitablity is Red's sole reason for writing her own book of Leviticus for me. I really wish I could be more compliant for her sake. Hey, at least I ate all the vegetables in the picture withe the succulent lamb bathed in exotic spices and seared to perfection over a wood fire.
Does lamb even really count as red meat anyway?